i responded to texts, and i checked that off my to do list.

i got out of my appointment today, and had a stack of unread texts. my natural inclination is to swipe it away if there’s more than like two messages because it’s just overwhelming. but i felt better today than most days, or maybe i just had a good appointment. i read my texts and responded to them! and listened to the songs friends sent me! and read the posts they sent me! and that was all before yoga class like damn ok molly look at you replying and shit.

but an old friend sent me a song. it was anthony green’s cover of numb, but i still feel it. and i felt like hey why not i love that song from what i remember. and then i was listening to it and realizing i hadn’t listened to floral green in like a decade. and i listened to the album through four times today. and it was a record i listened to a lot when i was learning how to play guitar and figure out what tone i wanted. i’m realizing now how much influence i think that record had on me as a songwriter, especially in my formative years as a songwriter.

a few years ago, i worked with a producer when i was in a pop band. we brought in this stack of demos of which i wrote the instrumentals for them. he was listening and was like, “you know it’s funny - you write pop songs but like with punk chords and formulas” and I’m like well i think that makes sense.

and something I think this upcoming record has is some of that stuff. but also not. it’s hard for me to explain because i am too close to it and i know that. i wish i could leak it but its fine it’ll be out soon and ill talk about that next week.

and its funny that me reading a text lead to a chain of events where i realized some things, and revisited some records, and let myself feel those things again. and that’s sick.

i gotta get better at responding to texts.